Rest In Peace Jackie

I know I said I was going to post a Etude House BB cream review and I will I have it saved as a draft but I’ve been feeling really depressed lately.  I’ve stepped away from the Internet, FB, Instagram, and I’m behind on my school work because its really hard to deal with how I feel. I just wanted to be alone.  On Tuesday the 19th I had to take my dog Jackie to get put to sleep.  It was the hardest thing to do.  Jackie was the first family pet.  We got her around June/July in 1998 when she was a puppy.  Jackie was 14 years old and would of been 15 if she lived until  June/July.  She was seriously the best dog anyone could ever have.

My baby Jackie

My baby Jackie

I actually chose her when we went to look at puppies.  She was the runt of her brothers and sisters and no one wanted to buy her, but when I first saw her running towards me in the pet shop, her ears were bouncing up and down and it reminded me of little pigtails it was so cute I wanted her.  We bought her and I remember holding her in my arms and she was shaking, she was so scared.  I knew she would have a good happy life and she did.

Old pic of Jackie and me I used to tan so much and my hair was so short!

Old pic of Jackie and me I used to tan so much and my hair was so short!

Jackie was a Jack Russell Terrier, short hair, and long legged.  Jackie was soo brave nothing scared her except lightning.  Jackie was the smartest dog I’ve known I’m not just saying it because she was my dog but because its really true she was way smarter than my other 2 dogs.  Jackie was very poised, had good manners, classy, she loved to dress up, she never liked to get dirty, and always walked with such grace I always said we should of put her in dog shows.  When Jackie was little I swear she could almost jump over the fence!  She used to jump soo high.  She took care of the house very well, she always waited for us to get home and would greet us at the door.  She wouldn’t sleep until everyone in the family got home safe because she would wait up for us.  Jackie was caring, loving, and the sweetest person ever.  I say person because I swear she did not act like a dog I really think she was a little person inside.  She loved to eat sweets just like me, we would sit down on the couch and munch on sweets :)

Jackie loved wearing pink clothes especially her hoodie

Jackie loved wearing pink clothes especially her hoodie

When my girl friends would come over she would want to be in the room with us having a girls day because she thought she was one of us.  One thing she did hate were older men except my dad and my brother.  If any of my guy friends would come over she would attack them or be sneaky and then go behind them and bite their leg lol.  She bit a man that came over to fix the air conditioner  one time haha.  She was such a faithful dog when we moved houses a couple of years ago we were scared she would go back to the area where she grew up but she didn’t she went everywhere we did.

Jackie wearing my beanie

Jackie wearing my beanie

About 3 years ago Jackie started having complications.  Her allergies started acting up, her ears would be swollen especially her right one.  She had to get surgery on her right ear and it never remained the same.  Then later her right eye ruptured we took her to get surgery, and they had to remove her eye it was so sad.  It bothered her so bad but she never made any noises or complained.  After her surgery she was running around and so happy.  A couple of months ago she started acting weird.  I took her to the Dr. and she had back problems.  Then she couldn’t walk straight anymore, she would walk around in circles, and would fall on her face.  Then she couldn’t eat or drink water well.  January was the hardest not just on her but on us also.  She wasn’t able to walk at all without falling down.  We started feeding her mushy dog food by hand, and would have to give her water.  We also had to buy diapers for her because she started going to the restroom on herself.  Seeing her deteriorate like that was so hard because I never once thought that this day would come.  Jackie just kept on getting worse and worse, and at night it was very hard to sleep because she would start crying.  Jackie never made any sound EVER!  She would only bark, and to hear her cry was torture.  To hear her crying in pain hurt me and my family so bad.  I could feel that she was in pain and when she would look at you, all you would see was hurt in her eye.  Her eyes weren’t sparkly with happiness she just looked so sad.  She was really sad because she saw my other dogs running around and she looked like she wanted to run around with them also.

Jackie loved hanging out with me in my room <3

Jackie loved hanging out with me in my room <3

I NEVER ever wanted to take her life.  I took her to the Dr. to ask what we could do and there was nothing that we could do that was the best option, or to give her high dosages of a type of steroid that would keep her alive but she would basically be a vegetable.  My parents didn’t want to so we didn’t put her to sleep.  Like I said she got worse, and when she bit through her lip and didn’t even know it but just felt pain it was time.  As I’m writing this you don’t know how many tissues I’ve gone through because I lost my best friend.  The house feels empty without her.  It really feels as if a person has died.  I am a strong person, and I felt I had to be strong for my family. Tuesday my brother and I took her to the Dr. I really wanted to turn around and not go through with it, but just by looking at her sad face and seeing how much pain she was in I didn’t want her to suffer anymore.  On our way there I did what she loved, she loved riding in the car with the window down so I had to hold her up towards the window.

I would give anything to see her again and coming to my room to see what I was up to and lay next to me.  I miss her so much, my family misses her so much.  I know my brother is really sad because we got Jackie when he was 3 they grew up together.  If I ever have a family in the future I would love to have a Jack Russell because they are great dogs.  I will always have a place for her in my heart and one day I know I’ll see her again waiting for me.  I love you Jackie rest in peace.

Jackie with her head out the window on our way to the beach

Jackie with her head out the window on our way to the beach

About emilykawaii

LOVE to review makeup, products, love helping others about beauty advice/tips. I am a makeup lover (more like hoarder), I make youtube videos, shopaholic, love gyaru style, love hello kitty (maybe too much), shoe lover, love healthy food, and nail art so this blog will be about me and all those wonderful things :D
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3 Responses to Rest In Peace Jackie

  1. Wow I started crying so bad..I don’t know how it feels, still I can understand because we have a dog too. She is so cute and you just love them, they really are a part of your famly. I have always wanted a dog but I never got any when I was young, but now that I am 18 my dads’ new wife decided to buy one. Ofcourse I was super happy, but at the same time I knew there would be a day when she wouldn’t be here. And it makes me so sad when I think of it, even if I won’t live with my dad and his wife at the time. Still I know you have and I aswell, appreciate every day you get with them, and it’s really what counts, becuase we know the time will come but until it does, we focus on the positive and to make thier life great:) You are extreamly brave to put this out, I usually just keep everything I feel inside of me^^’

    Jackie seemed like a wonderful dog, she was super cute and seemed to be so kind! My condolences and I hope she rests in peace!

    Hugs from me!^^♥

    • emilykawaii says:

      Aww I didn’t mean to make you cry I was just letting my feelings out. Yeah a dog or any animal will bring you happiness, well don’t think about it too much just enjoy the time you have with them right now. Aww *hug* thank you so much yeah I wanted this blog to be about my beauty reviews but also about my life, I think it helped me more to write it out and share how I felt and still feel. Yes she was ^_^ she was a sweetheart thank you so much for your kind words :) it made my day have a great day/or night :D

  2. Pingback: Dolce Delights and Baby Shower | emilykawaii

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